i may just
fuck around
and go ahead
and jazz up
the syntax
one of those books
he was 21
wildly popular, a bestseller
a movement, a manual
a holy calling, a prerequisite
the book sold more than a million copies
built on a promise
there more be a formula
a legacy of youthful certainty
a purity culture code
a new attitude against low expectations
an immediate sensation
true love waits as
a crazy backwards performance
an independent investigation
shame, disillusionment,
dysfunction, divorce
is the biggest thing i’ve ever done
a huge mistake?
its own particular mystery
its own signifi cant changes
a complicated endeavor with
no magic formula
a low commitment good time
an occasional time waster
a text only fantasy
i’ve done it myself
just walked into what not to do
- to me, at least
the future is really clear
and there is no better way
to proceed
yes, you did a wrong thing,
letter writer
there’s nothing to congratulate you on
the best you could hope for is an absence of harm
defi nitely fi nally
... writing poems in shower in... it’s own quiet way - like
what am i doing -
... with my time -------
i’m reading and uh,
responding...
i’m just thinking
in the interest of self-correcting
(i hate multitasking)
i drink two beers and then -
then - i have coff ee
“i am married to my work,”
i think
while i ignore the dog
by nature, i’m tired
but built for sin
well -
well -
well -
you are a rotisserie chicken,
i tell you -
you
glisten golden and
sweat delicious tender
you
nude on the beach
and
i think of food instead
i should have told you what i was working on
it’s another love poem!
for you and only you
again -
i wrote it for you while
i was at work
the dog ate a flower
you called it a petunia
you looked at the dog
and called her petunia
and now you’re both
petunia to me
(now here’s the thing)
my life garden has been stomped on
and not much else grows
but i have a few petunias
i water and feed and
they seem to be happy
where they are
i have a lot of friends
they think either poems are
too long
or too short or -
why do you even do this thing?
what if someone spiked my drink
when i went to the washroom?
my poems are casual -
like, lay beside someone you know and love and -
you just stop thinking
it’s - you know -
my poems
they are like
watching the off ce on netflix
again and again and again
erotica:
evolutionary human desires
beyond my technical capability
to be elite and joyless
spontaneously lifting your shirt
celery, pineapple = significance
blossoms in a closed institution
i’m not too proud to take a pill for it
2257 compliance
my dreams aren’t sexy
i don’t think they should be
should they be?
the underlying notion to perform
like you’re being watched
provided that my mood doesn’t swing sour
and i’ve shaved in the morning
google what you’ve always wanted
universally distributed desire
my venezuela
as something sublime
it is a grey day
you are reading out loud in a grey hat
you took your coat off
and stood in the rain
you always crazy like that
we are so self-absorbed
i told you that
a cortado
a class issue
this morning
your eggs over easy
everything must go
liquidation sale
cleaning solvents
forever summer in
the used book store
half-love-letter
this, a tool
to serve your needs
i would prefer to die in a traditional way
they had to study latin
they had to study greek
i can’t believe it
it’s a miracle
i can rarely express myself in my own words
moving on
every fi lm needs a fi lmmaker
a prayer, a desperation
your name becomes synonymous
with natural disaster
formal requests aside
i can relate to this
the letter ‘d’ in greek
we talk of our bubble
our ecosystem
like it’s a bad thing
who invited the animals
to make an appearance
at the end of your poem
it just happened like that
i suppose
it doesn’t involve you
anyway
i mop floors lazily
but i do it every day
i wash dishes like i’m still mad
about 9/11
we want things to work out
in the end
whispered coda
to me
i don’t think i can resume
this american life
a biological need
beyond the city
even past the florist
that sells lillies
destined to die
in a day
but still you buy them
i congratulate myself
and celebrate by
reheating a coff ee
still, i don’t tend to
fi nish much work these days
i ready books i should have never bought
i never should have bought and
i especially shouldn’t have read
i fake insurance papers because -
why not?
because i can?
can i write about moving?
new brunswick?
jail?
how could you leave me
when i needed to
side effects of phenibut include
nausea, irritability, dizziness, headaches,
and others
i’ve come home, i’m so cold
i calculate my time by
minimum wage detail
i will not write a preface
it’s natural
apparently descriptive statements
reveal circumstance
through mistakes
either, or else
“ambition”
being a synonym for
“not good yet”
i must not be joking
for example
i must not be writing a poem
outward, or visible
my spiritual assumption
of a spiritual shackle
promising, or merely
a matter of uttering words
our word is our bond
your word, i bet
i do
a commitment to fact
our work is our bond
consider
you will remember
heaven help us
say something
do something
i assume
worth considering
no doubt
i am drawing your attention
to something else
true or false
a characteristic mark of
certain people in certain circumstances
which bring out the
void without effect
a letter number letter sequence
an incomplete classification
god in lowercase
me, the cat on your lap
or dog
dog being italicized
after established victory
and defeat
and exhilarated
in habit
we turn back to kissing
it’s just a sunshower
it’s just a bit of rain
in a white dress
in a white room
with black curtains
the dog just barks
the dog eats books if you
leave her alone for too long
in a white room
the dog just barks
i’m with you in a one-bedroom apartment
where we hug and kiss the puppy
under our bedsheets
the united states of the dog
that barks all night
and wont let us sleep
people get weed giggly
marijuana giggly
over ice cream
you prepay your credit card
and you need more $$$
for books
that’s why
someone is mastering
a .wav from an .mp3
and back again
i value my alone time
this is why i cannot meet you
for coff ee
the sports star’s house is
white, clean -
all refl ective surfaces
they are never home, right?
i assume the hired help
keep it this way?
saddam
hung in low quality video
where is my bin laden cell phone video
huh?
must read 50 pages a day
in this book i don’t want to read
but write a book about regardless
infra-red
ultra-violet
this,
being inherited from the
novelistic tradition
fi rst, common sense
next, experience
bright in vision
if we carry out
certain operations properly
non-essential
sentences and words
spoken in my voice or
written on a screen
“the frightful laugh of the idiot”
the public enemy
the public, enemy
let us begin at the beginning
artistotle’s defi nition of the rationality of the poem -
ideal causality
ok - if we start here -
we can easily say that things change
no - things stay the same, but the circumstances change
there is no longer any measurement,
anything in common
are you thinking
rage against the machine
blood, banks,
dr. martin luther king
a man dying of hunger
demands justice
you gotta sell out eventually
all black paintings
sell quicker
god, i want to prosper
to provide,
to be precise
how to rework
the work
and make it work
for once
am i just a love song
in the age of subject hopping?
am i more suited
to an art gallery?
how do i focus
on work
that contains anything
that contains everything
?
records, books, paper,
staying indoors in the sunshine
paralyzed
by culture in general
by nihilism in particular
terrible black and white
“i’m so sweaty, hug me”
me, i’m good at waiting for you
i fi xed history
one personal history
so mired in dissolution
and exaggeration that
i, that - i,
i hate hearing people’s stories
you, the great illusion
kidnapped,
held at gunpoint,
hacked,
escaped via motorcycle,
robbed,
lost a passport,
assumed a diff erent identity,
smuggled in a cargo ship
establishing a mythos for
some future partner
to fawn over
the point being -
it being too hot
so the dog barks
and she whines
and i sleep on the couch
or try to, at least,
with her on my knees
feeling safe
she is probably barking right now -
me, being away from home
her, unaware i’ll be back soon
i clean dust from the ac unit
i should clean the fl oor
i washed the dishes
with the dog at my feet
i am not sure what direction
this work is taking
it’s not up to me, i suppose
i couldn’t imagine being positive
mystery,
as developed by mallarme,
as adopted by godard
originally, they both whispered
am i being overly political
or absentmindedly contemptuous
i point and feel unable to adjust
i am the same as yesterday, and you?
adapting a laid-back lifestyle
indiff erent, but - no, not falling back
into the problematic drinking and drugging
to - “kill time”
no, this is less -
hmm, uhhh -
disconnected
“too many words”
repeated
“too many words”
i do not intend to respond to this claim
i do not need to
paint or write graffi ti
or take photographs or make blogposts
at this current time
i fall asleep early
i fall asleep while you watch the offi ce
i, i - i do not know
why you are so angry all of the time
why are you yelling,
i’m sure the whole building can you hear you
everything bragging in this myth
i don’t have any interest in
there is nothing visible and true
i’m feeling discouraged
i am talking too much
poems become increasingly rare
shorter, even
something dry,
refreshing
viognier, maybe
i’m not sick of reading or writing
i’m just bored or distracted, maybe
distracted -
i check the time again and
i’m distracted
on the other hand,
i’m learning how to be dry-eyed
in the real world
you, distributed over the greek landscape
we dance after a few drinks
you lay in bed and sweat
my goodness,
we spend a lot of money doing nothing
we spend a lot of money and i’m always surprised
we pay in cash and disregard reciepts
we did two things and spent $200
at what point did i become
afraid of the grocery store?
am i just lazy?
no, i know it’s just a waste of money
i don’t like cooking
i should wake up two hours earlier every day
i haven’t been sleeping because of the dog
the dog barks to pee at 6:50am every day
that’s fi ne,
i usually have to pee around then, too
what do you mean your credit card is maxed out!
you haven’t done anything!
i order food for pickup
schnitzel sandwich
no grabiche (it’s gross)
the same thing every week
you’re not matching my energy
you’re not being nice to me
you beat the rain,
the thunderstorm
it’s raining, but i suppose
it’s not raining-raining
is it your nose ring that smells
or the hole itself ?
dead skin cells, sweat,
sebum, it’s the sebum
(oily secretion something)
someone is screaming
something something
watch and fucking learn,
you fucking -
oh, you’re going to get it
let’s commit a crime
as a bonding exercise
something petty
let’s do something fucking illegal
in this sunshine
the city’s so famous for
i will never be a famous poet
because i don’t romanticize the landscape
i will never be a famous poet
because i am not friendly
an-envelope-of-money
as-a-way-of-life
who will be my fate?
up and down
on holy books and graves
infi nite space
for bad dreams
i’d be a mouse
or a cat
as variable as it is missing
not cleaning but considering
never answered seriously
(when it comes to being true,
at least true to me)
two turntables
too expensive
2 realize it
but you’re
all toast
no bread
tonight
i’ll be home before
the streetlights turn on
defaulting on washed-out
destroying pleasures by naming them
sign/signifi er
consider the premise
folders titled ‘footnotes’
and in interviews, confessing
“she dreamt she was alone in an empty fi eld”
paradise,
something similar
whatever
who needed
“the invention of morel”
was it marker?
herzog had his “peregrine,”
that i remember
afraid of mirrors - still
we speak with intimacy
trip-hop, terracotta, tourists
things i need to fi x
no locks work
or they are weak, at least
just talking books
sunset nervous
the word “eternally”
is no exaggeration
the world
a better place
there, you see
the repetition of activity
maintaining it’s attributes forever
not an optical illusion
a nose bleed written in a story,
but not in reality
i exist to
charge my phone
eat expensive meals
and be horny at inconvenient times
let me sweeten this fantasy by reminding you
i’m writing in public
and i don’t carry a backpack
the rain came and greyed the sky
and went away again
the rain turned to steam on mid-july pavement
you are preparing salad at the sink
making a mess for me to clean
i read of you
in rilke
an apocalyptic breakdown
of you
before you were you
to me
some security, please!
stop vandalizing my dreams!
i read your name on a wall
forgetting it was me that wrote it
true blue montreal
me and you
dry humping
zero dark sexy
the word “sex” means less
yves klein blue
eyes pantone primary
for a few moments
everything is empty
all maxims dropped between
due black and bruise
oh, he’s just airing out his suicide lines
the rehearsed ones
i don’t feel good
avoiding touch, fl inching
i’m just, uh, lol
crushed by sunlight
if i died, i wouldn’t be worried about
writing or painting
lol
climate change
i can’t recall how cold it was last winter
or warm
lol
right
i don’t care
let’s get this bandage off quick
all capital letters
if it kills me
your name means oblivion
in a forgotten language
multivitamins to fi x my mood, everything
taken seriously
seriously do noting anyways
in unnatural focus
all the time you’re obvious
steadily more fantastic
marked by rapid shifts
the whole thing
without being crushed
i went to sleep
productive in myth
and bad dreams
paperback herbal remedies
everything matching up so fast
you could hardly speak
someone baking cookies
someone barely reading
locking into situations
corrected
feelings run away
a permanent job
automatic refl ex
fi ghting
dark at 5:15
subtle misunderstanding
until surrender
stop the car
delusion
acquired new emptiness
stumbling out of biography
passionate details
and endurance
before coff ee
once going, you couldn’t stop me
this whole miserable story
you’re being dramatic
it’s really you, isn’t it
in spite of our diff erence
readily available to become addicted to
vice, surveyed in retrospect
(this, a study in clickbait)
it was late, i bought us drinks
a single piece of the puzzle
plus 20% tip
collecting, collecting, collecting
appointed to focus
word of mouth is
what we are looking for
this and that and we learn really fast
the work is fl avored from last night
i can move all the furniture
by myself
i’m sick of weddings, caterings,
unloading jeeps,
ordering paper
i wanted to die
documenting a war zone
collecting, hoarding
an entire, room by room, list of my things
no peace in my presence
me, an introduction
me, a starter pack
it’s been hard work
they say
searching the ruins
what i could get for nothing
is what i need
withdrawing into
headaches, naps,
books, magazines,
the cocktail hour
passing fancy
to putter, to poke around
it, decisive
it, love in all it’s facets
all my words for working
dehydrated staring
coping mechanisms vary
i purchase, i participate
studious habits to fall back on
and attack
surface, depth
weak tea
if i can have your attention,
your quiet beauty
miss calvin klein
miss hocus pocus
overeducated dulling
experimental me
no hairbrush
show and tell and declutter
admiration, love
all my stuff
rags to riches
not poor, i mean
but savings poor
life rich
rich in spirit
i quit
remarkably good
at not working
or witholding key details
such as
“my art is complete”
i write in the fi rst person plural
goodbye,
i’m expensive in fi ner fi ction
nothing if not public
rehearsed blow by blow
by collecting vast quantities of information
i can target you with precision
click bait but in real life
obsessive endless nowhere archive
people who break things
nothing particularly tragic
i keep my distance from empty rhetoric
pursued and beat to death
ronde infi nie des obstines
the unending dance of the stubborn
great literature serves some great purpose
as if
except those that resemble me
more interested in the ritual than the content
you know i keep you in my pocket
who’s streets?
our streets!
trespassing!
romantic, in a may 68 sort of way
dovercourt meeting place
dovercourt vicarious myth
here
everyone is yelling
“where the fuck is my money”
7am important thing morning
the sun goes up,
we go missing
the anxiety that wakes you
and puts me back to sleep
amnesty me
i have had enough
don’t folklore me
in three-plus-two rhythm
too soon to tear down the barricades
je suis new yorker
je suis paris review
je suis art forum
as long as we keep arguing
an immediate schedule
known by heart
one sings, the other doesn’t
making sense only out of context
repaving the ground with good intentions
cliche, in french,
meaning photograph
documentary techniques
blending truth and fi ction
and pointing it out
me, the audience
me, my real name
me, sweating renaissance
naturally good
je n’y arrive pas
a tragedy, my love
of destination
i will be reporting
from my desk
a drone shot:
meeting my gaze head on
a tragedy,
i’m eager to see
me, without the slightest indiff erence
me, supressing awareness
fact seeking
accidental death
altogether too much space
gramsci in prison
de sade in prison
wilde in prison
and the rest
backpack, cash
love goes to press
daily life,
but not everyone’s daily life
you couldn’t be careful all the time
this happened,
that happened,
this always happens to me this way
drunk accident optimistic
resisting biography
the south of france,
a lover present
a fi nicky voice speaks,
“eventually love shoots you in the head”
when did i become worried
life, being hard, mostly
when and how i will go
no york to run away to
so i walked
suggesting my ambition is
a death sentence
english as a second language
in a non-fun way
wish you were here
a master’s degree
in psychology
or counseling
passing out to slow music
new career
255th dream
searching for my other half
who left the bed before noon
wanting me to stay asleep
fuck this mint tea
everything i do seems to hurt me
fruit in the morning
survival instincts of a nectarine
everything fake plant scenery
devoted prayer singing
visible trance
constellation gemini by night
red, rouge
me, you
isn’t that love?
me, a little bit beuys
riding my bike too fast
avoiding blue coats
xerox noise
acid free archival
subliminally enhanced
macbook majesty
you, a yard sale
defi ning “choice”
answered with a band-aid
no business card
but taking care of it
en route to naropa pilates
made in america
discipline in any sequence
avoiding the passive voice
manuscript never enough
and again,
holy mountain semicolon
what would i look like
waiting
less than enthusiastic
destructive casualness
according to ability
according to need
born in january
born in may
classifi cation:
you help me to exist as
a dependent clause
better end to my story
on stupid vacation
i forgot my toothbrush
my teeth hurt
i wanted a coff ee
but i settled for beer
and seventeen dollar eggs
our plans are concrete
a sweater gets stuff ed into the front of one’s jeans
and sticks out the back
they call that the ‘tenneessee tuck’
they call it that
too fancy, too clean
close to the mainstream
who could be certain?
do i cut my hair because it’s fall
i mean, whatever
a spiritual retreat
a journey towards healing
i like you in that jacket, zipped up to the collar
faux-fur salut ca va
drive safe, a mother could be in this car
i wanted to fi nd a spot, you know
for both of us
under this blanket
vraiment
i don’t ca-a-re
i’m not moving here
i changed my mind
all clerical error
but the sun shines so nicely,
merci
no change, superb
it’s busy, i’m smiling
standards are down
call me by your ex’s name
- the last three, at least
“literally,”
meaning
“fi guratively”
hood up,
15 degrees colder than i’m used to
discussing the weather, boring
all noses point down
absorbing wind at the bridge
you’re too hard on ourselves
“work,”
“crime”
creative problem solving
i’m telling you,
i’m fucking serene
arugula simple interest
art criticism
the second drink, solved
interrupted by a ring tone,
a sour voice insists it set to silent
fuck it, let’s go to urban outfi tters
i need an escape
maybe i will fake an accent
barricade myself indoors
argue my name
through emails
basic house maintenance
watering plants
and learning quiet
like most
and quitting smoking
i’m stinky, same clothes
six days and waiting
why am i complaining
on vacation
variations on a theme
withdrawing into research
unfi nished focus
like most adventures i’ve had
you speaking greek in your sleep
i don’t black coff ee dream
somehow keep thinking
i packed your bag
you call us a cab
what time is it
time to go
for immediate use
lapsing at syllable’s end
early morning
distinguishing
an annual disappointment
as i live and breathe
after all
something must be done
about your poise
knock on wood
sunglasses and traffi c
the heat’s on
and the hot water
stays hot
patience
against all odds
and discretion
not exactly a twist of lemon
pitch fatigue
i’ve been trying
it must be the language barrier
new yorker at the cosmetic counter
they guess
i defi nitely said yes
no glasses help eyes dry
why my anxiety lately
someone states
“sometimes domestic terrorism is necessary”
and is greeted unenthusiastically
i persist
singing songs of civil war
that don’t belong to me
“it’s us versus them”
or rather
“it’s them versus them”
an oversight
pronouncing words without speaking
in your head, i mean
the worst kind of
analytical self
chronicling
parallel passions
not sentimental
laughing, feeling nothing
notes, folds, underlines
systems of intimacy
counterintuitive
really, a labor of love
remaining helpless
waiting for hummus
notepads, cameras
unfortunately
ruining the story
sugar in your cappuccino
october 4th
not rent paid but patio eating
“you work hard”
but i don’t think about it
i mean, the work
i fail long-term existing
these days, i’m an answering machine:
i’m not here, i’ll get back to you soon
my essay didn’t start
with a fantastic opening sentence
what accurate information do i need?
october 11th
my life has become altogether too recreational
very diff erent from where i was
- 10 years ago
- 2 years ago
maybe, victim complex but hey, i’m trying
“i’m too old to change”
a bitter end for a well-beaten horse
thus, proving my thesis
am i working linear
or past tense
temporal clues
clouding pleasure
cheque, please
transcribe this and
atomize me
repeatedly visiting
ground zero
this tendency to obsess
on never getting better
undiagnosed mental illness
because hey,
who wants to know why they’re fucked
then i would have to make strides
to fi x it
a whole
landscape
of experience
there is nothing i can’t google
obsessive cataloging
it doesn’t matter what you have
as long as you have a lot of it
objet trouve
put it on a grid please
fi ne, whatever
right click -> view source
club soda no show
uncomfortable with vomit
save as copy
various index system
the library of babel
comma, comma, period
information vandalism
paywall, author, punisher
i’m excited for our year of
conventional symmetry
freedom is not something you live down
clap clap
no guts clap
no glory
clap clap
you’ve got the wrong guy
no, you don’t
ok, just checking
too easy
do you see the diff erence?
no, that’s disgusting
i feel out of place
smiling with my teeth
take a woman like you
grown ups
add texture
punching a wall
it’s nice to be seen
you create the problem
when you assume these things
i remember thinking
what would i even hide in a secret hiding place?
inconvenient, but important
that’s not what it’s called
tempura
mutually assured destruction
i’d roll the dice for that
why would you go through someone’s phone, though?
perspective, i guess
it’s my guggenheim
and this is my process
the ugliest people write the best poetry
wait, i read that wrong
it’s not a competition, of course
this is taking
FOREVER
it’s almost the witching hour
of metric validation
1-9-8-8
even in death,
a colossal pain in my ass
yeah, right, of course
and everything turned out fi ne
god, i could be so lucky
if not surprised
an origin story:
registered without choice
rendered in an identical style
it’s not your fault
fi le THAT under future problems
doors slam,
that’s how things happen
a raincoat, an umbrella
tell him what he wants to hear
incomplete
as a reference
worth it
i would love to, but i can’t
suggesting warmth
i can’t tell if i’m functioning
thursdays are long, painful days
for those who work weekends
can you grab me a name brand advil
and an .avi rip of something familiar?
something safe and boring
star charts
and you are?
i shoot, you run
i need throw up but i keep asking for more
evoking an explicit position
where i lie about writing
yeah, totally, if i can
soaked in a very specifi c virtue
newsfl ash
this is my most authentic self
CCTV me
amazon package arrow
formal color studies
woah woah woah
save password
eff ortless
fair use copyright
you know i love you forever
stop me if you think that you’ve heard this one before
loved loved loved
every page
what kind of message is that
you’re right, i’m sorry
coffee?
not for sex
not for art
i’m onto you
memorex suits me just fi ne
etymology: “loss”
one step further
precisely why
i’m competing for attention
i hate this show
nude pixelated nightmare 9/11
she has a gun
here’s a nice dress, i’m spinning
straddling format
you sleep with your phone under your pillow
you, you look greek with your hair unwashed
the future?
no, fuchsia
individual circumstances
pertaining to essence
the pleasure principle
the worst thing she ever did, you know
i didn’t know she released a book about it
extinction looms
in the scenario i’m about to describe
a sexual fantasy
can we start over
love is a mystery
a incomplete collection of prose
it’s too late for you to tell me
about your favorite movie
no doubt about it
dinner party escape
the work was complete
but quickly abandoned
saying nothing ever
not excited
but worker’s hands
whichever case
into place, perfectly
just take it nice and slow
unless it was actually spontaneous
just like in the movies
a verb
well, now daytime
don’t even think about it
disappear and don’t say goodbye
killing time, they call it
organization
puff y eyes
masculine energy
right now?
right now
not good with directions
well, no, great at identifying landmarks
yeah, like what convenience store you prefer
turn right there
red stop light slow to green
where the tags were
just a hint of paint
buff ed but it’s been there
de-narration
not a story, but a retelling
mutual warmth
an important turning point
you’re trapped
you force yourself to adapt
the face of another
as a bystander
i fi nd myself silent
ordained by a higher power
magnifi ed, like a close up
let’s not fi ght anymore
i hate green tea
nature,
and myself
tora, tiger
tora, prayer
tora, tora, tora
cat, wherever you are,
peace be with you
the end
now the real problems start
someone else’s spring
“don’t die”
poetry, language, thought
i’m crying from acceptance
knowing i’ll never met another lynx
well, we are on our phones
- then what?
low battery life
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